Last night before leaving for work, I make a my bed with a fresh set of sheets!! I arrived home at 6am, on the dot, looking forward to climbing under the covers. I made my bed 'so tight', that I knew it would feel like I was climbing into a hotel bed!! 

I pulled my car into my drive, and while I was still sitting in the car, started writing my blog!! (it helps to write my blog as I think it, throughout the night/day)

It was still pitch black outside, so I knew I had a few minutes before the sun would rise and before it started to feel like morning (I like to get to bed before the sun rises if possible, that way my sleep feels like a 'night sleep' instead of a 'day sleep'.....it must be psychological)

Within minutes, my husband arrived home. I was completely engulfed in my writing that I didn't see his head light pull into the drive behind me. He quietly approached my car and began rocking it back and forth.

This rocking rhythm, instantly had me thinking...... "He's Horney, I just know it!! Well, of course he didn't disappoint!! He motioned with his hairy eyebrows, suggestively!! He didn't even have to say the words. I knew, by his look, what he was after!! 

I smiled, as I do, with an "OK, I'll be there in a minute" look and continued to write. (after 22 years together, you can just read each others thoughts, just as you can finish each others sentences when talking) He walked away and entered the house.

Within less than a minute, he returned to my car. At this point, I had the car door propped open, prepared to climb out, and go inside and enjoy my morning "Fuck Session". When he angrily blurted out "YOU LEFT THE STOVE ON LAST NIGHT"!! 

Well, his accusation instantly pissed me off and "Puff" there went his chances of having sex with me, today!! (I didn't leave the fucken stove on.......fucker!!) 

We had a full blown verbal argument, that I'm sure woke at least one of my kids. I was trying to explain, that I didn't even touch the fucken stove last night. I took my dinner to work and used the microwave. He accused me of being a forgetful blonde, that I took as an attack at my age. (WTF.....was he trying to say he thinks I'm already suffering from Alzheimer's? Well he can forget about fucking this "Old Lady" because I might just forget that he turns me on!! Son of a bitch!!)

I entered my bedroom depressed, feeling like shit, angry and grab my oldest looking nighty (cause my husband is gonna suffer for that one) and I crawl into my bed!! Thank God my 'Hotel sheets' felt so good that I drifted off to sleep without brooding over this blue!!

Later in the day, my son admitted to hearing our argument and admitted it was him, who left the stove on last night. 

Now, I'll play my 'wounded feelings' part and wait for my husband to apology!! (he definitely owes me an apology for this one!!)

[Please Note: this is a humorous, fictitious piece of literature meant to make you laugh or make you go hum?  This is not based on any fact. I hope you enjoy this little story, because a "Story" is what it is!! Remember to pass along my web address and invite others to enjoy it at http://dessiesdiaryblog.yolasite.com PLEASE DO NOT PRINT THIS MATERIAL